Nine Words Women Use

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead:
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh:
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . That will bring on a ‘whatever’).

(8) Whatever:
Is a woman’s way of saying GO TO HELL

(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it:
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.

3 Responses to “Nine Words Women Use”

  1. Amber Jonson October 20, 2009 at 8:54 pm #

    I can think of 9 other words my roommate uses… but I’m too Lady like to use them here ;-) great piece BTW.

  2. Michelle March 23, 2010 at 8:25 pm #

    OMG…these are too funny!! Mind if I post them on my fb page?

  3. Zach March 23, 2010 at 8:40 pm #

    Sure just give me some credit http://facebook.com/ZachSchneiderFan

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