How NOT to be an enormous douche when you are getting to know a woman.
I came across this blog entry from a friend of mine, named Zach Schneider in Michigan. When I read this entry I found it to be very true and I wanted to spread the word to all guys out there so that they can treat women the way women should be treated.
###########################################
1.) SINCERITY If you can’t act or speak with sincerity then just don’t. Nothing is more unattractive. If you don’t mean it, don’t say it. Don’t try and make yourself up to be something you are not. She will know, and she will laugh her ass off at you later.
2.) STFU Don’t talk about yourself too much, if you must expound upon your latest and greatest exploit don’t be a braggart. Make the story entertaining, short, and the ending should lead into a question you would like them to answer about themselves. You are trying to get to know them. Rattling your bonebox about yourself all night shows women one thing: your complete and utter lack of interest for anyone but yourself.
3.) BE A GENTLEMAN Your actions speak louder than your words. You are being examined most likely under a hell of a lot more scrutiny than your feeble mind could manage in her direction. She is paying attention to how you are moving, your facial expressions, and especially how you treat and speak of other people. You are a man act like one. Be respectful to those you come into contact with. Stand up when she approaches the table if you are sitting. Take her jacket. Open doors (car doors too lazy ass). Pay for her drinks. Should she decide to thank you, her company and continued tolerance of your dumb ass should be thanks enough. Nothing is more disgusting than expectation of compensation monetary or otherwise.
4.) OTHER WOMEN Don’t talk in any amount of detail about other women. Ever. The only exception: how much you love your mother (don’t take that too far either lest she confuse it for an Oedipus complex). Contrary to what you might think she doesn’t want to hear about how well you treated the last woman that dumped your dumb ass. She also doesn’t care how many other women think you are great. All that matters is her attention, and you won’t be getting it talking that way because again it only enhances the appearance of your own self interest. Seriously this is a great way to move a girl from love interest to permanent friend status real quick. You will know this has happened when they start telling you about their exes.
5.) MANNERISMS Show your interest by maintaining eye contact. Yes eye contact. You may let your eyes stray across her features on occasion, but nothing will class you as a pig faster than you staring at her body. Move with confidence and intent. If you are going to do something do it with aplomb. If you fear a fiery crash you will create one. Don’t. Women can read facial cues much better than you. Nothing is more disgusting or sad than a man who looks at a woman with needy desire written all over his face. I saw it sitting there, that means she saw it 10 fold. You can get away with a lot of facial expressions, but needy/unsure is not one of them.
6.) TOUCH Don’t grab women. Ever. If she wants you to touch her she will invite you to. When you decide to take this invitation touch should be light, fleeting, and it should be directed toward a respectful part of her person. Her arm, shoulder, hands, neck, and for the bold her face. Again if you can’t do this with confidence just don’t. Confident movement and sincere intent is the difference between desirable contact and disgusting groping. Gentleman don’t grope women.
Anyway if you are an ENORMOUS DOUCHE and have read this note, hopefully you can get over yourself and realize that sincere intent trumps posturing bravado and can lead to an actual relationship as opposed to… well whatever the hell else you might manage on your own. In so doing perhaps you can shed your previous title and become a real man. Good luck!
